not only once or twice I have been thinking about these matters,
its already take almost more than half of my time to crucially think about it,
I am scared, I feel insecure and sometime I just think I can't do it.
The reason I write this post, I really want to comfort myself and I want to tell myself, I can do it even its look impossible. So many time, when I thought I couldn't do it but when the challenges passed I be able to get through it. So many things, I said I couldn't do it but when the time went by I be able to face it.
And dear, this time around is the same thing. It is just a piece of another taste sweetness of life. These obstacles wouldn't stay like forever. It wont!
Some people may say my obstacles isn't tougher then their. Yes, that's true. But, Allah does not burden His slave beyond what they can bear. Yours burden is perfectly designed for you. And my burden is perfectly designed for me. It won't be the same.
You may see my obstacles is just a tiny thing compared than yours but then why do you thing, I could not think the same like what you've been thinking? Why I could not think your burden is just a tiny thing than mine? Why I should deny I face nothing than yours? huh?
Hmm. Do not compare your level with someone's else level. Because we face different things, we live a life in different ways, we create our own journey in different story line. We might meet in the same spot in our pathway but we never be in the same journey until the end.
If I said it is tough, I just say in my own context. I don't have any mean to compare with other person's life. Hmmm..
Next semester will be tougher than other semester. I will take extra credit from others. I am scared I will be down throughout the next semester. I am scared I will cry over the night thinking how I can finish my study. I am scared I will be so stressful. I am scared if I feel hopeless.
But, the most scariest thing, I am scared if I decide to give up upon everything.
I pray to Allah over and over, just to allow me to be strong and brave. I pray to Allah over and over for Him to help me out whenever I don't find a way. I pray to Allah over and over, so He may stay with me until the last battle. I pray to Allah over and over so that I am fully rely on Him because I never can make myself to walk through this journey alone. I need Allah to help me and remind me, He is the only Helper.
And hopefully one day, I will proudly read this story again to my grandchildren and encourage them to pursue anything they want and 'shoo' off what makes them scare.
Pernah bercita-cita untuk menjadi seorang juruterbang wanita pertama Malaysia, tetapi sangat mencintai dan ingin mendalami ilmu biologi, namun telah dipanggil untuk menyahut cabaran dalam bidang seni bina walaubagaimanapun telah ditakdirkan menyambung kehidupan sebagai mahasiswi kejuruteraan elektrik-elektronik ketika ini. [3rd year survivor of electrical & electronic engineering student]
Wednesday, May 17, 2017
If I am not mistaken, ramadhan is just less than two weeks more. Personally, last few days I was still confuse what goals I wanted to set for this ramadhan for reason I could keep on track to do unlimited deeds. Then, what kind of improvement I wanted to make for myself so after ramadhan leave me, I would be someone much better than before. Something I could measure so that I am not being syok sendiri or perasaan sendiri while doing ibadah for Him.
Then, I watched this video.
Its gives me rough idea what kind of ramadhan I shall have. Thanks Allah cause sending me this video. Hopefully, ramadhan 2017 will bring me closer to You and build me to be a good practicing muslim and be better person.
Ramadhan 2017 is different from other years because I will spent half of ramadhan at my workplace. And yeah, I want to share, I already get my internship placement. Alhamdulillah. Even though, I actually haven't decide yet either to do my intern there or wait another offer because there are few reasons I couldn't state here why I still not decide yet but doakanlah semoga Allah gives the best for me. If going there will make me a better person, may Allah ease it.
Shall I go or not to go?
Go or not to go.
Go or not to go.
Go or not to go.
Is anyone here, have been working at PPUKM? Can you share your experience?
Tuesday, May 16, 2017
I love chocolate VERY MUCH and one of my favorite is NIPS. I even have spontaneous habit while eating NIPS. And those who knows me well, will recognize what is the habit. NIPS has 5 different colors inside one packed. I will eat all the colors except one, I will keep the one for the best to be the last. I called that one is my color of happiness.
When I shared my NIPS with anyone, I will make sure my happiness NIPS won't be eaten by any of them. I said it to them, don't ever take that color or I won't share my NIPS with you for the rest of my life. HA-HA.
so, guess what color is my happiness NIPS? jeng.. jeng.. jeng...
Friday, May 12, 2017
Kali pertama aku mengenali diapada tanggal 13 September tahun 1995,
Namun dia telah mengenali ku
9 bulan lebih awal dari tarikh itu.
Malam ini izinkan aku menceritakan
segala yang hebat tentang dia,
kerana aku mahu dunia tahu
super hero itu memang benar-benar wujud
dia adalah guru pertama aku,
untuk setiap kali pertama cubaan aku
dalam mengenali dunia ini,
dia sentiasa ada bersama aku.
Thursday, May 11, 2017
It's been awhile I tried to write this story, but I lacked with ideas and my hormone didn't work efficiently to activate my writing mood.
Last year, I went to Aceh for educational and spiritual trip. I called it, Trip To Find Who Am I In This World? So, it took one week for me and my friends to discover everything about Aceh; its histories, cultures, places, people and of course its foods! Well, it's not so everything but I must say I quite satisfied and blessed to have this chance to get there. Alhamdulillah.
Even though, the journey wasn't going smoothly as planned but every turn the plot twisted, it went to something much much much better. Well, Allah is the best planner after all :-)
Having a trip in big group and quite long time was great experiences, I learned so much things through them. It was not easy but it was good opportunities to build my inner side for the sake of goodness. Seriously!
Basically, one of my favorite place in Aceh is Pulau Sabang. In Pulau Sabang, we found one place named Sumur Tiga, it has private beach that is super super beautiful and lovely. The sand is white, the sea water is very clear and I saw a cast of crabs on top of the rocks. I am truly falling in love with the scenery and I just feel want to build my own cottage and spend my whole life there.